Thoughts of a Top Cat

Oh, runty doo like a soot case but without the soot. hear she is arfter der payrents got back from near dartmouth road in devon and she have taken over the dads' soot case (why they carry soot around when they go on aweigh i never understand).

so, yoo arsk, hoo is the uther runty cat??? this is archie wot live with danl and rosis. he is a smorl runty scaredy cat (not like mee!!!) wot offen vom is pouchkin of wiskers cat food and tork too much. my dad say hee tork even moor than runty and that saying sumthing. enny weigh he sleep in a place corled a conservative or conservatoire in the daytime wot keep him worm. he the won wot is too frytend to play with a corky the cork and can only manidge a rubber band. ha ha ha!!!!!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!

my runty is compleet bonkers and bite her tale lots but she ai'nt a scaredy cat.