Thoughts of a Top Cat

Well, now I has bin abel too eet the propper food aggen for a bit i has a ver ver happee tummee aggen, as yoo can sea from these luverly fotos of my luverly tummee. luverly luverly hills sigh-ence adult lite is back in a big big sack, hooray hooray horray!!!!!!!!!

now I has just scene that a big man corled loo-chee-are-no pavagrottee has died and i woz wotchin him on the telly and he cood hardlee work, he wood have to leen on sholders to work, ver wurrying. so i decided to get out corky the corky to play aggen. i is so farst with corkee that it do'nt look good on a foto, bit of a blurr with the speed i moov so this is won arfter i has finished playing. oh yes, i neerly cort a magpye the uther day, well not kwite, i woz pritty close to it and orl crouched down when the lucky berdy dun fly off, so no berdy in the house, like wot oskers' starff doo get in the house when she doo get the histeric's. this loo-chee-are-no! bloke go vincherro vincherro orl the time but my dad sez the big joke is that he nevver had a big eenuff voice to sing the part wot that noisee song cums from ha ha!! its corld calf or calaf or sumthink from Two-Ron-Dot (wot a silly silly name). dunno personly do'nt like this oprah thing. my dad sez he woz a tenner, well thats' a big number, ten, no wunder he woz so fat, he kneeded a hills sigh-ense food ten minus very light!!!!! i think this loo-chee-ah-no probbly gon too my dads' jim corled Fatness Fast. but, and this is ver important, he was oanly a tenner and i is eleven so i is hyer in the peckin order than wot he is, and he was far two fat too bee abel to petrole his territtorree wot must have bin pritty unimportant in the plaice corled modena cos not eeven on my map of the werld.

look, i wont too make wun thing ver ver cleer, ok??? i duz not follow the hoomans rownd when the cum home cos i is in need of lots and lots of strokes and woz lonely, i duz not get lonely when i is on my own, i follow the hoomans and let them stroke me lots sew that they feel sick-yure and they no that i has bin out petroling the territtorree and gardin evrythink. in fackt, i has a noo sleapin plaice cos my territtorree is sooooo big, but i is not gowing to say ware it is cos my dad sumtimes reeds this blogg, but he doo get cross if i is not their too doo my jobs like gardin the woshing and stuff wen it is beeing hanged owt - so i is dooing it aggen cos he complaned and moaned and moand cos i woz not their. and ackshirley, if my dad has too pop in too get sumthink when hanging out the woshing then he kneads me their to gard it, like wot i has had too doo too times this weak!!!!

and annuvver thing!! orl this stuff bout danl having a long jerney to kingstone and lookingafter orl the pay-shents wot is sick, blah, blah blah. wot abowt mee, gardin the plaice and orl that??? i no kingstone is a long weigh away cos on my map of the werld its' on won of the lines wot the hoomans fourgot too culler in. no i is not jelluss of danl and the attenshon he get but he is not shuvving mee down in the pecking order, i is telling yoo that for nuffink!!!!! and wot that bleedin roses dooin hear (ack-shirley, she kwite nice and give lots of stroaks but that not the point).

well thats' it four now. have a good weakened (thats' wot hoomans corl satterday and sonday - dunno wye).